International Men's day

I'm not one for celebrating International Days as I believe we should be doing this kind of stuff everyday. However, if it raises awareness, or gives people knowledge that could make a difference, then I feel it's important to recognise these things in any way possible.

Full disclosure here, I didn't actually realise what International Men's day is really about and the messages that sit behind it. I, like many, thought it was a day to celebrate men and the impact on the world we have had. How wrong I was...

It's actually a day for raising global awareness for the many issues that men face day to day. The day is underpinned by '6 Pillars' which form the objectives of the day:

1. To promote positive male role models; not just movie stars and sportsmen but everyday, working-class men who are living decent, honest lives.

2. To celebrate men's positive contributions to society, community, family, marriage, child care, and the environment.

3. To focus on men's health and wellbeing: social, emotional, physical, and spiritual.

4. To highlight discrimination against men in areas of social services, social attitudes and expectations, and law.

5. To improve gender relations and promote gender equality.

6. To create a safer, better world, where people can be safe and grow to reach their full potential.

Interestingly the theme for this years day was 'positive male role models'. It's interesting for me for a couple of reasons. Firstly, there is a theme in the men I have worked with recently who have suffered from anxiety, lack of confidence etc. and it is that they all had a lack of positive role models in their life, especially as children/young adults. This lack of direction led them to make decisions which didn't lead to the best of outcomes.

Secondly, my own lack of a role model growing up has meant that I have also struggled a lot with the choices and decisions I've made over the years; my brother was in the same boat so what happened in his formative years may have influenced his choices, which ultimately led to him taking his own life. This theory is for another day.

I've recently started a journey of discovery around emotional dysregulation as I come to understand some of the choices I have made, and the behaviours I have displayed over the years. It appears most of my problems would have started in childhood due to a lack of father figure.

This learning has taught me to be a much better human being, not just for my own children and those close to me, but for helping others through my work.

I'm very humbled that through my lived experience I am able to help others.

I have a lot of really positive mental health workshops and sessions coming up which will see me doing a lot more of what I really enjoy (and am good at) and that's helping people 'make sense of the non-sense' and using E+R=O to help them make informed and better decisions. Really exciting times ahead.

To wrap this up, please give the men in your life a hug. I'm sure they, like me, are doing their best with the resources they have. We won't have all the answers and our own lack of a positive role model means we may not have made the best choices at times, but there wasn't always a manual to follow!

Exciting times ahead for me at K&RYN so please keep following and supporting me; I truly appreciate it. And if you know someone who could benefit from a session with me to look at making better decisions or to help reduce anxiety then please get in touch.

Thanks as always for reading.

Diesel.